marriage, relationship woes

Mr right


Regardless of your desire to admit this to yourself or not,every woman who is yet unmarried and every man too,constantly is in a state of searching,looking,assessing and trying to find someone to be with.
Someone to laugh with,share their tears with and someone who will understand those moments of silence when far more words are ever spoken than in speech.

this is everyone’s desire.
I am yet to meet anyone who does not want to get married.
perhaps such people exist and their stance was probably born out of unpleasant experiences…
Most times they have been married before.
In the case of a single young woman or man who says they have no plans to find a partner,I am yet to find one.

What baffles me is the ammount of single,young and searching people out there.
There’s so much wisdom out there’so many clever people and yet so many can’t find what they want.
That soulmate.
As the world gradually shrinks into cyberspace
We are moved beyond our physical environment into other worlds and spheres of life.
We meet people on social networking sites-that should be a post for another day.
Yet in all of this,so many are still single.

If we must be honest with each other..it isn’t as easy as it comes off.
We could write a perfect list about the perfect man.
How he should look..the things he should like.
All of that.
However,,let me say here that the real factors that determine Mr.right are not his height,his carriage,his face,all of that.

These are the real issues.

1..EDUCATION
you think everyone out there is educated right?yes,maybe you did.well,I thought so too..until I met graduates who can barely make a correct sentence.graduates both male and female alike but let’s face the males here.
Then there’s the part with the ‘type’ of qualification he has.
Very touchy but will be best left to your imagination.
This is also where the issue of #gbagaun arises.
This is where he doesn’t know how to conduct himself in public.
This is where he says chingum very loudly while you are both on a queue at shoprite and everyone including that well bred and regal looking female ahead of you turns around and gives you a sorry look.
This is where he is chewing loudly at a restaurant and you are besides yourself in shame.
Or the part where he argues on the phone with your aunt who is trying to give him directions and she drops the phone saying-“that driver must be so dumb”
You can barely speak at this point can you?
Now this is also the part where on top of all of this,he thinks he is the MAN!
He will embarrass you and now you have to check yourselves guys..if you gbagaun excessively,there is no harm in buying correct grammar and reading it..I hear there is also a book on correct use of tenses too.
Yes I know you probably spent your time in primary school crying or playing football.

BREEDING
You think this doesn’t matter right?
Well he also thinks hitting you is normal.
He won’t open the door for you.
Especially those heavy glass doors
Personally if done to me..I consider a crime.
My hands are small and going first doesn’t mean I should push the heavy door for both of us.
That’s if he even let’s you go first.he will help himself and stand indoors waiting for you.
A man who didn’t have certain types of conditioning when he was young will be difficult to cope with.
He takes you home after a date and leave you at your gate then zooms off.
Even in the university we knew not to leave friends(talk less of someone u like/love)without the knowledge that they are safely in their compound..you had to use your headlamps to fully illuminate the gate and ensure they were in before u flew off.

3.RELIGION-
Christian-Christian
Muslim-Muslim
Other sects-same sects
This ensures everyone has harmony
The exceptions being that one party or the other is willing to make sacrifices.
Huge ones at that.
Besides the fact that religious beliefs shape our thinking,some religions influence dressing,behaviour and comportment as well.
A Muslim female and a Christian man?
Or a Christian female with a Muslim man?
If you my sister would enjoy converting to islam,fine.
If you would love your children as Muslims fine.
Within Christianity are further divisions.
We all have certain values we would love to instill in our kids.
The catholics,anglicans’methodists’adventists.
What have you?
I cannot begin to imagine a Protestant from Christ embassy for example with a catholic man.
It doesn’t just work..there will be issues.
I leave the rest to your imagination.
The major problem arises with the children.
Everyone wants certain values impacted.
There is no doubt that with considerable tolerance you will have a long marriage.
your children may end up confused.
They may not know which way to tilt

CLASS
Enough said already
A millionaire can marry a help.
A female heiress can hardly marry beneath her class.
Class contributes some deal to breeding
But that’s not all of it.
Thing here is this.
For females,a guy below your class will hardly earn your respect unless he has worked through the ranks and reformed himself.
Masculine pride will not allow him the humility of person to learn certain things.
You will not think alike.
What is a regular convenience to you,may be such a luxury that is not allowed to him.
Like I’m not saying be rich,be rich.
But when there are similarities in your backgrounds..it counts for something
At least be on the same plane.
Not different platforms.

For want of saying too much..
Everyone can add their little bits,based on their different peculiarities
What remains is that Mr.right is not so easy to come by in the end.
Finding someone who meets just four of those aforelisted requirements satisfactorily is no mean feat.
there’s so much more.
However I have decided to leave personal things out of this and keep them to the barest minimum finding Mr.right is certainly not a joke.

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2 thoughts on “Mr right”

  1. Certainly not a joke nor is it a game.. 50yrs with one person is a long time to try to change the person or argue unnecessarily over diverse sorts of diversity..
    I believe people should try to find someone who is very similar to them. That way, you won’t be travelling and be scared your kids would have changed to your spouse’s ways which you abhor..

    The Lord has to help us all with this. We can’t help ouirselves..

    Like

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